There is a lot going on in my head at the moment
First of all I have been in love on and off with one guy for the past three years. he is the first guy I ever fell for and that seems to have had an affect on me. In more recent times I went out with another guy who was amazing when we were together and I really felt I had fallen for him but then one day he randomly said this isn’t working sorry. I got over him but the other night I found some pictures from when we were together and I just broke down in tears. I haven’t slept more the one night consecutively in the past 6 weeks since a whole lot of people I knew died. but that doesn’t bother me I can deal with not sleeping and I can deal with heart break over past relationships. but this one relationship that i have wanted for so long just will not escape my head. to me he is the ideal person. people keep saying ah you dont want a boyfriend they treat you so badly but id do anything to be treated badly rather than not be treated at all. you make me smile every time i see you. i dont always show it but i do. i get nervous when we talk and bitch about you to my mum. You’re the guy for me and you hardly know I exist.
